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Friday, February 25, 2011

PHANTASM FRIDAY

A CUPID INTERVIEW


My guests today are, George Matthew Franklin and Michaela Miles – please, have a seat on our lovely couch! – from Philadelphia, PA. Their tale can be found in What Not to Fear a novel creation by Robert C Roman.

Before we begin, I must remind everyone to please try and keep your responses to a PG13 atmosphere – the Moonlight Mistresses rules, not mine *eye roll*. Double entendres are acceptable and widely encouraged for events and phrases we don’t want our young readers to really know about. Oooh, it will be so much fun trying to guess what you’re really saying!

*Settling comfortably onto the sofa, draping his arm over the back and sipping his bubbly* That Miss Havana in Reaper’s Domain is one hot teacher and boy would I love to get into her…class! I might actually learn something…oh…did I say that out loud? *Clears throat* Sorry. Let’s get back to the interview.

You two make one fine pair! I did a wonderful job pairing you two up if I do say so myself! Then, I just love all of my matches!

Cupid: Please, George, tell our readers how you two first met. Was it by your design, or hers?

Matt: Please, call me Matthew. I’ve never particularly liked ‘George’. At any rate, we met at work. I’m a forensic investigator and Michaela is a police detective. As to which of us made the first move, that would be me, I think.

Michaela: Yeah, Frank. You caught me by surprise in the elevator. I still feel a little stupid for stopping you, but… *shrug*

Cupid: Excuse me, but… Frank?

Michaela: Well… Yeah. I mean, c’mon. Look at him. He’s a friggin’ giant. He’s two feet taller than me. I think Frankenstein fits him pretty good. Besides, you just get used to using last names in the precinct, and his last name is Franklin.

Matt: Our first date was her idea, though.

Michaela: Was not!

Matt: Michaela, you invited yourself over to dinner with my parents.

Michaela: Hey, your godmother invited me, not the other way around. ‘Sides, I didn’t hear you complaining.

Matt: Touche.

Cupid: Michaela, would you say it was love at first sight or did you find him repulsive?

Michaela: I… OK, look, if you so much as crack a smile, I’m making your dentist rich, but I had some issues when we met. I’m… I’m working on those still, but… Yeah, no. It wasn’t exactly love at first sight. Something like that, but not quite love. ‘nuff said.

Cupid: This one’s for both of you. Since chaotic happenstance tends to put characters like yourselves in situations where they must work together or live together for one reason or another, tell us what chaotic happenstance “forced” the two of you to work or live together. How did you feel about this?

Michaela: Oh, that’s easy. Captain Hayes decided it would be a good idea for Frank to follow me around like a puppy, sniffing for clues. Like I said, there was an attraction from the very beginning. I didn’t really know how to deal with it, but I, uh, figured it out. Yeah, that’s my story and it’s sticky.

Cupid: Don’t you mean ‘you’re sticking to it’?

Michaela: Yeah, that too. *smirks*

Matt: I wasn’t exactly forced to work with Michaela. I was assigned as her partner, and I certainly didn’t mind. She’s the most attractive woman I’ve ever met.

Michaela: Frank! How can you just say it like that?

Matt: *shrug* It’s true. Y’know, I still wonder if our… little friends *mimes a butterfly* had anything to do with Captain Hayes decision.

Cupid: Little friends?

Matt: Er, I’d really prefer not to mention them by name. They’re a pair of Pixies, and they’ve recently been elevated to positions of some power in the Unseeleigh Fae Court, and they might hear it. They moonlight as Fairy Godfathers.

Cupid: It sounds like they’re in the same line of work as I am. I’d love to talk to them!

Michaela: Ooh, yeah, no. Frank’s right, that would be bad. X doesn’t like you much, and he carries a shiv. *covers her mouth*

Matt: *winces* Yeah. Maybe we’re lucky and they’re otherwise occupied. Next question, before he shows up and gets violent?

Cupid: *looks askance at the couple* Okay, this one is also for both of you. How long did it take you to know your true feelings for the other? At what point did you know, “this is the one”?

Michaela: True feelings? Heck, I’m still not sure on… No, that would be a lie. I think I was attracted to him from the first moment I laid eyes on him, but I didn’t really admit any of it to myself until he called me back. It’s not easy to turn your back on Heaven, y’know.

Matt: *smiles* I knew I wanted her to be the one from the moment I laid eyes on her. I don’t think there was a single moment when that went from wanting to being, for me. She grows on you.

Michaela: What, I’m a fungus now? I belong sliced on your pizza?

Matt: *chuckles* Sweetheart, your Pesci impression really isn’t as good as you think it is. You’d need to be taller and a lot less cute.

Michaela: *blows a raspberry*

Cupid: Matt, what would you say was your biggest obstacle to overcome before you could settle into a relationship with Michaela?

Matt: Other than the demon trying to kill us? Probably dealing with her intimacy issues. Totally worth it, though.

Michaela: You’re sweet, Frank, but you’re full of crap.

Matt: Hey! You did have issues. Still do about some things.

Michaela: I meant about me being worth it. You got complaints?

Matt: *grinning* Not a damn one!

Cupid: This is for either of you. Would you like to thank anyone – other than me, of course – for getting you two together?

Michaela: Well, there are the… You know… *whispers* Pixies.

Matt: They really did do their best to help us out. I never really got to thank Ricardo for his help… *facepalm* Oh, hell.

Ricardo: Matthew! My help, she is my gift to you both!

Michaela: *looking around panicked* Ricardo, where’s…

Ricardo: Oh, my X? I am making with the calling of him now! X! Our Matthew and Michaela, they want to give us thanks!

Cupid: Pardon, Ricardo, but… Fairy Godfathers?

X: Problem, dawg? Ricky gots to get him his Jimmy Choos, and I gots to get cheddar for that. Them things ain’t cheap.

Ricardo: *flits over to X, whispers in his ear*

X: *settles back on Matt’s shoulder* K, C-dawg, Ricky say he don’t want me hook you just now, ‘cause he want a favor from you. He triflin’ but he my shawty, so I gots to chill.

Cupid: Ah, right… Moving on. I know our readers have enjoyed learning about you two so far, but I’m getting a little bored, so I’m going to heat things up. Michaela, how would you end this sentence, "I wish Matt would _____?" *leans forward to eagerly hear your response*

Michaela: *blushes* Oh, I really don’t have any complaints. Matt’s the… experimental one.

X: You try that thing Ricky do with his wings yet?

Michaela: What? What thing is that?

X: Oh, yeah, you ain’t seen that. You start hoverin’, then Matt…

Cupid: Okay then! Pardon, X…

X: Dat Baron X. I a made G, dawg.

Cupid: Baron X, then. I think you missed that ‘PG-13’ warning at the start of our interview.

X: What, you got kids watching this? You whilin’ dawg. OK. Kids, don’t do drugs.

Cupid: Okay, then… Matt, would you prefer to give Michaela a bubble bath or a back massage? Why?

Matt: A bubble bath, I think. Simple reason; we’ve never tried that before. We’re both fairly practical. We’ve got a shower at our place, but no tub.

Cupid: How many of you remember that old show, The Newlywed Game? Well, these next questions are going to help us play a similar game. Matt, what would Michaela say is your aphrodisiac? *waggles eyebrows*

Matt: *grins hugely* Oh, no question. Caramel.

Cupid: Michaela, is he right? How would you have answered that question?

Michaela: *blushes furiously* Uh, yeah. Yeah, no. I don’t think I would have answered that way in a million years. I dunno, maybe I’d say lasagna. His parents make a mean lasagna.

Matt: But you smell of caramel, Michaela.

Cupid: *crosses ankles and rubs his chin* Matt, what would Michaela say is a spot guaranteed to drive you crazy with passion? Is she correct in that assumption?

Matt: *pauses in thought* I’m pretty sure she’d say something that’s really not PG-13. She’s very direct. She’d be right, though.

Michaela: Frank! I wouldn’t say anything like that! Not in public, anyhow.

Cupid: Michaela, as far as you know, what is Matt’s idea of a perfect date?

Michaela: *giggles* I… I’d say… *laughs uncontrollably*

Cupid: Is she okay?

Michaela: *wheezing a little* I’m fine, really. I’m fine. Intimidating the local criminal element, followed by dinner at his godparents. We can skip the play at the end, though.

Cupid: That’s…Unique. Matt, is she right? If not, what is your idea of a perfect date?

Matt: Oh, yeah. It’s unique all right. It’s also a lot of fun. I’d still go see a play or movie at the end if she wanted though.

Cupid: Matt, your turn in the hot seat. What is Michaela’s idea of a perfect date?

Matt: Intimidating the local criminal element, followed by dinner and a movie. Or maybe skip the movie and go somewhere just as dark, but with a little privacy.

Cupid: Michaela, is he correct? If not, what is your idea of a perfect date?

Michaela: Remember that sticky story? Yeah. I’m not commenting on going dark places with Matt. Especially since he doesn’t bother to turn the lights off.

Matt: Why would I? You’re pretty.

X: Yeah, Angel, Ricky and I ain’t even about girls and we think you smokin’.

Ricardo: My X, he is right as always.

Michaela: Guys! No fair ganging up on me!

Cupid: Okay then. Moving on, the next two questions are for both of you. What's the most romantic thing your lover has ever done for you?

Michaela: It’s not what most people would consider ‘romantic’, but going after a Lord of Hell with his bare hands when she’d killed me… That was really something. Calling me back was nothing to sneeze at either.

Matt: Yeah, I guess it would take a lot to explain, but… When she said “I’m sorry.”

Cupid: “I’m sorry?” That’s not terribly romantic.

Matt: Well… She was throwing herself on a bomb that was about to kill my godparents when she said it. She was apologizing that she couldn’t stay with me.

Cupid: But you’re together now?

Michaela: I got better.

Matt: *groaning* I should never have shown her Monty Python.

Cupid: If you could change one thing about your relationship, what would it be?

Michaela: Issues. I’ve got them. They’re not fun, especially when I don’t know where all of the landmines are.

Matt: It might be nice if both of us could fly.

Michaela: Seriously? You can change one thing and you pick that?

Matt: *shrugs* You’d already mentioned the issues thing, and you’ll get over those in your own good time.

Cupid: That’s sweet. Possibly diabetic even. Have the two of you had time to settle into any Valentine's Day traditions?

Michaela: Not yet. I can’t wait to see what Frank has planned, really.

Matt: Yeah, most of what we’ve done has either been family stuff, work stuff, life threatening, or sticky. Not that I mind ‘sticky’ as a Valentine’s tradition, but I was hoping for something more romantic to go along with.

Ricardo: You could come visit us! My X, he has the cutest island, she is right down near Bermuda!

X: Yeah, we gots to jet. You come by the crib, we’ll hang. You can even bring the Greek if he’s looking to vaca. He’s not half bad lookin’ hey Ricky?

Cupid: Okay then! Thanks to Matt and Michaela for joining us today. We hope you’ll check out their story, What Not to Fear.

To learn more about Matt and Michaela’s author, Robert C Roman, visit: http://www.robertcroman.com/



Blurb:

Michaela Miles is the Philly’s best detective. Sometimes her methods are medieval, but that's not surprising. Michaela has been fighting evil for nearly four hundred years.
George Matthew Franklin, Matt to his friends, is on the cutting edge of forensic science. He has been paired up with the city's best detective to prove what the new techniques can do. There's only one problem: he won't find much evidence if he can't take his eyes off his new partner.

Michaela and Matt make enemies, because Bad Guys don’t like detectives or investigators. Demons and Fae, Vampires and Thugs, none of them can get away with misbehaving when these two are on the case. When they all join forces to take vengeance, everyone involved will learn that there are always worse things to fear.

Excerpt:

“You wanted to see me, captain?”

“Have a seat, detective.”

“I prefer to stand.”

The captain’s response was dry, his lips forced into a rueful smile, “I didn’t ask. We might be here a while, and I don’t want you looming over me while we talk.”

“Oh, please. You’re nearly as tall as me sitting.”

“You have exceptional talent at looming. Sit.”

The owner of the beautiful voice sighed, a sound like wind in virgin forest. “Whatever.” Matt heard one of the cheap office chairs give the tiniest squeak, as if a child had perched on it. “Why isn’t Frankenstein sitting down?”

The captain’s voice took on the clipped tones of a parent dealing with a particularly frustrating child. “He doesn’t loom, and we haven’t been making small talk.”

“Doesn’t loom? He’s a mountain! How does a mountain not loom in an office the size of a walk in closet?”

“Inspector Franklin, it appears the detective is intimidated by you. Please, have a seat.”

Matt knew when an invitation was an order. Gingerly, he settled himself onto a chair opposite the detective. As he did so, he caught a glimpse of…

Beauty. Perfection. An angelic visage gazed at him and found him wanting. Features too even to be real stared back at him, formed of skin like milk and framed by broad curls of jet. Lips the color of carnation petals moved, and her voice filled the room again.

“Captain, why is the creepy scarecrow staring at me?”

5 Moonbeams (comments):

Author Leanne Dyck said...

'I got better'--love that! Well done! Very funny!

JM said...

How tantalizing! I love stories with big men like this. Great post!

Robert C Roman said...

@Leanne - Thanks! Couldn't resist that line.

@JM - Matt's a big guy, all right. Thanks for the compliment!

Gracen Miller said...

Bob, I'm unsure who I love more, Matt and Michaela or Richardo and X. I laughed my booty off throughout this interview! With this interview, I'm off to purchase your first book and anxiously await this book when it releases (or am I confused and it's already released?)!!

Fantastic cover art!! Love it to pieces!!

Huggles,
Gracen

Kathleen said...

I ejoyed the interview and excerpt! Loved the way the characters added humor. Cool title and cover, too.

All the best!